Tag: Humor
Posted on March 22, 2026
Why I Asked AI Instead of My Dad
My wife looked at me and uttered the words I most dread in our relationship: “When are you going to hang those frames?” Pinned like the frantic rat I was, I looked for a limb to gnaw off …
Posted on December 24, 2025
Small Tests, Big Rot
I stared at the slow cooker, vexed. The mishmash of seasonings, broth, and chicken bubbled away, ignorant of the tragedy it unwittingly participated in. I looked at the clock and frowned, hoping daylight savings had struck early this …
Posted on October 9, 2025
Llamageddon: Why Toddler Bonding Trips Always Go Wrong
My son and I whipped down the Utah freeway at exactly five over the limit, and I knew that I was about to take the crown as the favorite parent. Since birth, he has made it clear he …
Updated on May 3, 2025
When Toddlers Rule the Zoo: A Lesson in Parenting Priorities
Toddlers love two things above all: chaos and the zoo. My son and I had a Dude’s Day at the zoo last week, and it proved to be a lesson in understanding priorities. Specifically, my priorities no longer …
Posted on March 4, 2025
Please Excuse the Interruption
I vanished from the internet. Not in the way celebrities do when a scandal breaks—more in the way socks disappear in the dryer, suddenly and without explanation. One post, then nothing. Radio silence. The cold, hard, vacuum of …
Posted on December 8, 2024
Twinkle Trials: My Journey to Holiday Illumination
“When are you going to put up the Christmas lights?” my wife asked. I looked at her much like how a cow looks at an oncoming train. In the eight years of our marriage, I had yet to …
Posted on November 10, 2024
The Caca Campaign: A Potty Training War Journal
Potty training. Two words that stoke the fear of parents more than any others. And yet, it is inevitable. Thus were the thoughts of my wife and I as we entered this most trying of times. Where others …
Posted on September 29, 2024
Through Fire and Fluff: How I Survived a Kitchen Calamity
The flash point for your average marshmallow is 200 degrees Fahrenheit. I know this because my wife attempted to burn down our house with marshmallows a few days ago. I was in our office when the cry for …
Posted on August 26, 2024
War is Gardening by Other Means: My Battle with the Weeds
I have never had much of a green thumb, but Colorado has done its best to remedy that. Unfortunately, its tool of choice has been weeds. It also decided to get a head start, with the weeds in …
Posted on August 11, 2024
A Man, A Wasp Nest, and a Lesson in Critical Thinking
I have a swollen lump on my thigh about the size of a tennis ball. It’s red. It itches. All in all, an unpleasant experience—zero stars, would not recommend. Why, you ask, do I have a red, itching …
